love
Feeling excited that I’m actually enjoying writing this final paper… & in Spanish!
I can’t believe how much I’ve learned in this short period of time 🇪🇸🇪🇸. I remember the days where I couldn’t even write a basic paragraph for homework and used google translate for EVERYTHING (or Chris Sich)… I also remember the more recent days I DREADED going to this class, and now I have a favorite quote from a book in Spanish?! I don’t want this experience to ever end.
|| El Cartero de Pablo Neruda — Antonio SkĂ rmeta
Faith & Love part 1
“Nothing beautiful without struggle.” — Plato, The Republic
Not traveling for the past two weeks have given me time, maybe too much time, to think and reflect.
About a week ago I posted about missing home. I was hoping that Sunday would be my low and I would start feeling better. I was wrong. That Monday night I hit a whole other low. (I contemplated if I should write about this for quite awhile because my previous post got a lot of attention and that is not my intention, but I think this story is crucial to illustrating the points I would like to make.)
On Monday night, my friends and I went to a Beer Pong tournament at a nearby bar. The bar was packed with people (including many of my friends,) yet I never felt so alone in my life. Strangely enough, at that moment in the packed bar, I began to think about the purpose of it all. Why do we bother to fight when we are struggling? Why do we so often feel so alone if we do not have a significant other by our side? Why do so many of us seek love consistently, but push it away the moment we have it? Why do the things that make us the “happiest” also make us so upset? Now, I realize I would be feeling the same strong emotions and concerns if I was at home rather than in a foreign country, but it is much easier to hide these emotions in the comforts of your own bed.
(It’s difficult for me to voice these issues and struggles that I have because I was raised to be strong, and having these types of qualms makes me feel broken and weak. But I’ve realized many people feel the same way, and that does not make them weak. I hope my thoughts can help them, because now they can see that they are not alone.)
As I mentioned, many of my friends were also out that night and thus witnessed my emotional breakdown, which was quite obvious because of the lack of my outrageously obnoxious normal personality. The following day, I saw many of them and they came up to me with sincere concern. They wanted to make sure I was ok. My previous day’s blog post and my lack of character the night before made them worried. (And I repeat this again, I am NOT writing this for sympathy or attention but to illustrate the power of friendship.)
I’ve been thinking about this all week, and I’ve come to realize that I think so many of us have it so wrong. We seek love in all of the wrong things. Today’s society has made us believe that sex means love, and that we need a romantic, and if not that then at least physical, relationship in order to find love. In The Republic, Plato writes about the love one has for a brother. I believe he did intend to refer to an intimate relationship, but not a romantic one. I think we need to remember those ideas and how important friendship is.
One instance that made me really realize these ideas, was the bar tenders, at one of the bars we go to frequently, were concerned about how I was doing. They even noticed I wasn’t being myself and wanted to make sure I was ok. I saw them on Thursday night, and they asked how I was multiple times. This made me realize they aren’t just the friendly bartenders, but truly my friends.
When we first arrived to Salamanca, we were told that it can be hard to make friends with Salamantinos. They are notorious for being cold and not letting people in at first, but they are also famous for being great friends, friends for life, once that relationship is made.
(sista sistaa)
(my leap-year boyZ)
(Oh Hey Diego 🙊)
<shout out to all my friend for just being>
The purpose of this blog post is to demonstrate that one can, and will, learn so much more studying abroad than just what is taught in the classroom. Being here has made me question a lot of things which I once found solitude and certainty in. This concept of love is difficult and complicated. It’s something we all seek and need, but can be so difficult to find and to maintain. I challenge you all to be better friends this week. This does not entail some dramatic gesture, but realizing the power of a friendship and recognizing how great it is.
Side notes:
I no longer can receive iMessages so please use WhatsAp to contact me. Also, some may have noticed that I have deactivated my Facebook. (I don’t know for how long, but I was feeling too “connected.”) I did however reactivate my SnapChat to share my experience at Las Fallas in Valancia with you all. Keep your eye out for those – Krysiaa321.
And I begin traveling again this week, so I promise my blog posts will be more focused on traveling and my geographical experiences abroad.
Thank you all for reading 🙂
Salamanca, SPAIN. 